In just a split second..i'm here already. i'm where i have to be, not knowing that time passed by too quickly before i can even realise it. I still feel like it's so surreal, like i can wake up from my dream anytime and be back to my normal life like before, but no. People say i am a confident person, i can do well, i'm strong, i will do fine and be okay. but i doubt all the words thay have spoken. i know myself better, i'm weak in certain aspects and i am not anything they have said. weird enough, i dont find college that fun, maybe not at the moment -- probably not everything flowed as i wished it to be. it's really time to learn how to be self-reliant, independent, adaptive, confident.... Oh and I lost appetite (used around one and a half hour to finish a meal), had (still having actually) sore throat..you can imagine how much i miss home right now.
Even at times i'm shakable due to some circumstances, but God i believe You have placed me here for a reason, a reason i have yet to discover. I clearly know that hardships are meant to mould me to become a better person and it's Your intention to let them happen. So God, help me to trust You and lean on You in times of difficulties. Strengthen my faith in You, so that i will not stray apart from Your laws. There's no other way except You, i know. Your promises are ever true and that gives me strength to carry on. Help me grow now..in this place i am and help me trust that at the end of all these, i am a better person. Amen.
I really miss EVERYTHING back home. But I NEED Your presence more.
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