Mindset

i don't know but life is a big circle
sometimes you're in sometimes you're out
sometimes you're just standing on the border line
it's true though, you can't fight with opportunities
some people throw in all they have for it
some people just get it without any hard work spent
call it unfairness call it injustice
but the world is just never on the fence
and no one ever bother to give a damn
even so you need not have to feel crushed
your mind is telling you what to do
but instead tell your mind what to do
consciousness is not exactly consciousness
what you see ain't really what it is
it's not about having or losing
you will have your part to do
everyone plays a different game
the hint is to play it with wisdom not emotion
and the aim is to be the light that shines
so that you lead people to your Goal
you choose what you think is best
you choose how you think about life
you either make yourself miserable
or you make your life meaningful
the undertaking to both takes the same effort
everything revolves based on your outlook


your thinking practically controls everything. so you wanna make a change, you have to first change your thinking and project it into an attitude.

Into the Realm of...

It has been a few days now and things didn't get any better. Every time i lied on the bed or the sofa trying to get some sleep I just couldn't. No matter how drowsy my eyes were or how tired my body was, my mind was just that reluctant to shut down and I even saw flashes flying by. The cause for this in one word should be - future. Have you ever got haunted by the unknown future you are going to venture into? That was very much how i felt.


This is how my new year started, somehow in fear and insecurity of the unknown. Although how much I convinced myself that God will make a way but still, maybe you call it human nature or whatever, i still freak a little at the thought of it - alright maybe quite a lot. This is one big step to take. What if I took the wrong path? What if I later found out that this is not what I intended? I was being reminded that these aren't the right thoughts to have, these shouldn't be my focus. It's not about what I want to do. It's not about where I should go. IT'S WHAT GOD WANTS ME TO DO, WHERE HE WANTS ME TO GO. Yea..true enough and of how little faith I am.

Now, about leaving, I never had a clear idea of that and how it'd be. To me, it's probably just a verb. But when I'm near to that, I could actually hear my consciousness speaking, "I don't wanna leave." However, leaving, in my dictionary equates to that of independence. This I must admit and it's what i really want to grab hold of. So conclusion is that I still have to leave, whether I like it or not. To where? That's the question.

I guess this is one of my very desperate moments. I'm quite an indecisive person so having to make choices? It'd take me longer than long to actually make up my mind or I'd just point to someone else for the answer. But this time is different, my turn to face up and do what I should do. No more escaping.

So hello world, I hope to see you soon but I wish I don't see you that soon.
Huh?
Ahh...forget it.

    You have brought me through many ups and downs and I trust that You'll lead and guide me through this as well. Reveal Your ways and plans for me Lord, for it's not my will but Yours be done.

Before you do ANYTHING, you need permission from GOD. That way, you'll be sure you're on the right track and much likely not to go wrong.