Anything but Nothing

To bad things

Temporary sounds good

How often will I need to remind myself

Yea..on earth nothing stays forever

That’s what made me fear

Yet somehow secure in a way

Entities fade

Future unpredictable

Lies never last uncovered

Dreams break into pieces

Relationships are fragmented

Life…is short

To good things

Temporary doesn’t sound as good

Supposedly I have everything I need

Sufficient clothes

Heartfelt warmth and love

Clean food

Shelters over my head

Yes, I do have all the things I need

But that’s what makes me fear

The more I have the more insecure I feel

The fear of losing is planted in me

Of that I couldn’t deny

What if I open my eyes with nothing left

What if my world is falling apart

What if everything becomes nothing

By this I prefer being empty

So that I can be filled

The world brings no happiness

Clearly we all know

We all want transformation and fullness

And fruitfulness in abundance

Just a hard core heart

A will unwavering

A passion ever on fire

A childlike faith

A generous and kind heart

And a loving nature

For the best things in life are free

I cannot choose because I am first chosen

My destiny, my purpose is not under my ability to control

So here I am, humbled by Your Majesty

Covered by Your grace so free

Here I am,  knowing I’m a sinful man

Covered by the blood of the Lamb

Now I’ve found the greatest love of all is mine

Since You laid down Your life

The greatest sacrifice

Majesty, Majesty

Your grace has found me just as I am

Empty handed but alive in Your hands

Here I am, humbled by the love that You give

Forgiven so that I can forgive

So here I stand, knowing I am Your desire

Sanctified by glory and fire

Forever I am changed by Your love

In the presence of Your Majesty

I know not what is ahead of me

I know not what You have prepared for me

You give and take away

In everything I know I am well

When I am weak then I am strong

For Your grace is enough

Enough to lead me through 

Every season of life...

Say it, mean it!

Seconds, minutes, hours

Days, weeks and then to months

Tell me how much have you accomplished

More like how much have you sunk yourself in falsehood

There is nothing other than excuses you’ve given

Nothing other than deceiving your own being

That shall follow with regrets and grieve

It’s tight, it’s raging, it’s a rush

But you chose to dwell in temporary lies

Where was the passion, where was the force

Where was the determination that was once there

It is a vow, it is a pledge, it is a promise to yourself

On firm ground you need to anchor yourself on

On faithfulness and disciplinary you need to hold yourself to

Detach yourself from duplicity

Fix your eyes on worthwhile goals

Regrets and grieve are not to stay

Victory and glory are on their way

It is a decision you need to realize

It’s time for goodbye to worthless enjoyment

That’ll lead you to unending pain and sorrow

Come on back on the path of diligence

He is ever present to your need

He is there to help...

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

On that brink of courage

-- You probably didn't know
it was anticipatory when i thought of it
yet again even the last tad bit of hope was torn
guess the gap is there to stay?
can't figure out what's left before my eyes
all is unpromising and unpredictable
how much i wish to just play cool
to be the one to put on the cold mask and walk off
convincing myself i can do it own my own --

In search of an answer

is it merely distance that parted the dream we share

or is it the wrong of time?

nights were drenched in drops of the saline

along with the emptiness inside

can you hear my thoughts

do you know what's in my heart?

the confession that couldn't be known

and the uncertainties that contain

i wouldn't ask for more

other than a sincere answer

....

"I need Your guidance"

“放慢脚步”

I thought I had everything right

I thought that was all I needed to do

I thought I was conscious

I thought I was right

I cared nothing just to get to where I want to be

Slowing down my steps?

Are you kidding me?

Time is running out like sands sifting in the hourglass

So c’mon, that is impossible

BUT maybe you were right

I should give myself a break

This pull is bringing me nowhere

Other than manipulating the truth

Other than forcing myself out of my own limit

I got carried away by the voice of the world

Which later implied into my sub-consciousness

Dragging myself to keep up with the pace

Which then worn me off so much more

Yea maybe you were right

I should decelerate to listen to myself

And what my inner being needs to say

To face and accept the fact that is set before me:

“I.WAS.WRONG”

No wonder the disappointments

No wonder the tiredness of moving forward

No wonder the depletion of strength and energy

And although I may not know how

But it doesn’t hurt to give it a try, does it?

“如果累了,就放慢脚步.休息,是为了走更远的路.” =)

没有对与错,就只有三个字...

我清楚知道这不是是非题

也没有是与否,就只有三个字

放不下...

All About NS

“You tiok or not? You tiok or not?”

Everyone seemed to be so concern about this. And like any other Form 5 teen, I was rushing to know the answer too. Without much thought, I took out my phone, sent the message and waited for the reply. But before I got the answer, I fell asleep and had this odd dream that I was chosen for NS. And because of this, I woke up with a mixed feeling. However, I was asked to check again as the namelist wasn’t complete yet. Nervousness grew as time passes. So when school ended, I went in the car straight and looked for my mum’s phone. Again, I sent the message and waited hurriedly for the reply. “Will I get a maaf or a tahniah?” I know deep inside I was hoping for a maaf. But I didn’t care less.

*******

Finally when the night falls, I was told the answer. My dream came true, I received a tahniah. I wasn’t sure whether to be happy or disappointed at that moment. But most of the time when I come to situations like this, I’d opt for the positive one, and so I did. I kept thinking bout it and the more I think the more I get excited. Could it be God’s arrangement? Soon, things began to make a little sense. I suddenly remembered the time when my friends and I were squeezing for air tickets to go on a trip to KL early next year. But disappointed cause’ I failed to get it. Instead, I’m on the NS list. By then, when they are having their sweet time on a shopping spree, I might be running under the hot sun craving for water. But I’m all okay. I still expect good things from this 3-months-camp because I always believe things happen for a reason and whatever reason it may be, I am going to get something out of it. Now, things just clicked well, didn’t they? Though you may argue that it’s just a coincidence, for me I somehow keep this conviction that I’ve been chosen for a reason and that good things will happen. It can be as simple as that because I place my trust in the Lord. What is it that He wants me to experience through these 3 months? God or bad, I’m only sure of one thing, that is I will harvest something back and it’s for my own good. I was once very reluctant about being chosen for NS, but now I guess I don’t repel it as much as before. Thank You.

Waking up early in the morning, running miles and miles like crazy, putting on that ugly uniform, swinging on a rope like tarzan, staying with insects, having a chance to fire a real gun, being forced to eat something you dislike, meeting new friends, experience things you’ve never tried before, get commanded, walk at high heights, climbing walls, sleeping on that hard bed with grassy blanket, get sunburned, bathing in cold water, sleeping with no privacy, get real dirty in the mud and more and more and MORE. Military life, what a challenge. God, bless me and help me through!

A once in a lifetime thing, appreciate it.

Good or bad, give thanks and praise.

In all situations, just stay positive.

You will find life much easier and happier.

Lastly.. God is with you, Emmanuel.

Let’s just view it with a heart of positivity, don’t let the sounds of negativity pull you off.

Listen Up!

I've got defeated by my own thoughts
I've gone through what I think was hard
I've broken down, I've broken into pieces
I almost gave up
Indeed, the days are tough
The road ahead will be even rough
But I don't believe there's any boundary
I refuse to believe the existence of impossibilities
And I've said that a hundred times
So listen up!
My God is with me by my stand
Who's stronger now?
You can think of ways to tear me down
Thank you, that's a good way to train me up
I'm not gonna raise the white flag
Why don't you wait and see
It's the flag of victory I'm after
You can't bring me down, no you just can't
And I will, I will defeat you with glory

Life is tough, every step is a challenge
Every second I'm standing in this battle field
Every moment, I need to fight
There's no way to escape this
You can tell I'm restless but time still flashes by
How can I possibly allow trials to shrink me down?
Isn't that what a loser does?
It takes such a great effort to just stand up again
To shout out in faith on top of the mountains
It is never easy and I'm sure I will stumble again
I have to, that is a must
But what makes the difference is
I will rise up whenever I fall
Yes you hear me, I ought to.



When no one shows you the way, you show them the way.
When no one proves that you can, prove them the otherwise.
You've just gotta fight for what you want.

Never, never let troubles stop you!

Portraying Imperfection

Alright I’ll admit but that doesn’t mean I’ll surrender

Every time I try to act as if things are okay, they’re not

Every time I try to steady my emotions, I fail

You may not realize, cause’ I never show

I’m not trying to bring out my anger or frustration

But for once I’m trying to be honest to myself

That I cannot handle everything

That I’m living with this frustration inside of me

That I feel helpless when there are things that I can't seem to solve

I have my own problems to deal and I wish to calm the fuss that's strangling me

I have my own pressures to cope and I wish to escape the fret that's suffocating me

By this, I am not as good as you think I am

And I am not always the kind of me that you see

Maybe it’s the mask that I put on, but no I wore it not because I want to deceive

But because I’m unwilling to unfold the other side of me

You can say that I’m trying to disguise my weaknesses

Or maybe the fear of exposing the truth that I’m imperfect, whatever

Still I never express myself because I never knew how

Taking it all in is wearing me off day by day

I know this is unlikely what I would say

But please allow me to vent it out once in a while

Though I might regret writing this

But I guess I have to accept the fact that I’m clayed with brokenness

As no one is ever perfect, so am I

         * * * * * *

And despite all those; I want to --

# Thank You for bearing all my sin and shame

# Thank You for lifting up the burdens I carry on my shoulder

# Thank You for listening to my complaints yet still loving me the way I am

# Thank You!

People, life is difficult if you try to handle everything by your own strength. Learn to give it all to Him and He will graciously grant you peace and all that you need. Other than that, learn to give thanks in your imperfection!

I can bear nothing if it weren’t You who bore my everything.

Isaiah 40:31

“But they that wait upon the LORD

Shall renew their strength;

They shall mount up with wings as EAGLES

They shall run, and not be weary;

They shall walk, and not faint.”

-Isaiah 40:31-

I like this piece of meaningful verse very much. The Bible often uses the eagle as an example for us to tune in during tough times. And urges us to be like an eagle soaring up high during the storms. Besides, it is also a promise from our Lord. He said that whoever hopes and abides in Him shall not grow tired, but will be renewed in strength and in faith.

 

Did you know that an eagle knows when a storm is approaching long before it breaks? The eagle will fly to some high spot and wait for the winds to come.

When the storm hits, it sets its wings so that the wind will pick it up and lift it above the storm. While the storm rages, below the eagle is soaring above it. the eagle does not escape the storm, it simply uses the storm to lift it higher. It rises on the winds that bring the storm.

When the storms of life come upon us… and all of us will experience them. we can rise above them by setting our minds and our beliefs toward God.

The storms do not have to overcome us. We can allow God’s power to lift us above them. God enables us to ride the winds of the storm that bring sickness, tragedy, failure, and disappointment into our lives, and we can soar above the storm.

Remember, it is not the burdens of life that weigh us down, it is how we handle them.

-Author unknown-

God never gives us something too harsh which is beyond our abilities. He knows our limits. If you are thrown with your problems, be sure to accomplish the “mission” He has entrusted you to do. Trust your abilities, if not trust His’.

So let us not grumble; let us not despair

Widen your horizons and you shall see

The beauty of trials concealed within

Walk in the darkness with faith abound

Imbibe the dissatisfaction and huff no more

Radiate the beam of confidence in awe

Be an inspiration to the wounded souls

Move on with life with triumph in hand

 Then walk out the storm with smile assured

Overcoming them all with victory secured

Always SMILE to your problems, not shout to your problems =)

Happy Birthday Daddy!!

BLESSED BIRTHDAY DAD!

though you never even bother to remember your birthday
though we are not there to help you celebrate
though you think birthdays aren't important
though you are a year older again

though you will never read this

though i never told you this:

*

*

*

 *

YOU'RE STILL THE BEST DAD EVER!

(my admirer. wahaha)

Thank you for just being my dad

Stay healthy and take care

God bless you!
We love you

 *hugss*

=)

it's okay already

you left me hanging halfway

how should i continue?

you didn’t visualize me the way

how should i lead?

you scattered the incompletes in my way

how should i start?

guess it’s not the time to bargain

guess it’s not the time to complain

you left me hanging halfway

it’s okay, i will follow the steps taught

you didn’t visualize me the way

it’s okay, self-exploring isn’t that bad too

you scattered the incompletes in my way

well, it’s okay..

i’ll just pick them all up from the beginning

but please, just grant me enough time

that’s my only wish, please?

He is the Reason

Are you tired of the unending question marks in your life?

Are you sick of the cruelness of this selfish and unloving world?

Are you seeking any answers to all the doubts and confusions that are within you?

Are you giving up hope to every situation that you can’t seem to find any solutions to?

I am.

We are always on the go, keeping up with the speed of this fast-pace world. Even if we are tired, we know that we cannot slow down. Afraid, that if we cease our steps we will lose something, we will be overtaken. But how much more can we lose? Because if we’re afraid to lose it is when that we lose the most.

We are always searching. Searching the reasons to

…smile

…believe

…live

 And I am even tired of searching the reasons to search.

One thing that I hate to admit, I have times when I feel discouraged, when I feel clueless, when I feel there’s no purpose in this life. Cause I’ve lost the meaning to work hard, to strive for something. I found no reason to live in such an uncaring world; that only money, power and fame speaks. So that’s why I’m always running, always searching.

I could’ve given up hope, could’ve given up life if it wasn’t God who sustains me. He speaks to me words of hope and encouragement through the Bible, sermons and peoples from around the world. He didn’t give up on me, so He doesn’t want me to do the same. He had to sacrifice His son, Jesus Christ to give me this valuable life. Even I have no authority over my own life, only He has. It’d be too foolish to think that this life He paid for on the cross is meaningless. He’s shown me the reason to live, because I will have the greatest treasure He promised me – the eternity of love, joy and peace.

Maybe that’s also why I always want to encourage and reinforce people whenever I can. I don’t want to see them suffer a life that could be so meaningful. Cause what God promises, God will provide. You might be blinded by this snippy, fragmentary world but never forget He can do wonders in and out of your life. Because greater things have yet to come, greater things are still to be done in your self-proclaimed fruitless life. “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17. You may think that life is inconsequential, but you can renew yourself in Christ Jesus. You are cleansed by the blood of the Lamb; go and find back the reason to live! To live for His glory! He has something profound for you, provided you seek it yourself.

He is a God who watches, who listens, who answers, who provides. He is everything. Since we already have everything, why are we still searching then?

You're the light in this darkness
You're the hope to the hopeless
You're the peace to the restless

This song reminds me to not give up seeking His goodness and glory because He can convert the bad to good. And a prayer is all I need :

VERSE 1:
This is my prayer in the desert
When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides

VERSE 2:
This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

CHORUS:
I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

VERSE 3:
This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

BRIDGE:
All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

VERSE 4:
This is my prayer in the harvest
When favour and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow

He made me understand that life could be much much better. Life isn't all about rains and storms. 

He is here to bring you out of this mess

He is here to bring forth true salvation

He is here to show you the light of hope

He is here to show you the meaning of life

Because He is here, that's why we are here

We are here to witness His goodness

We are here to sing of His praises

We are here to glorify His name

We are here to live for HIM!

*A prayer can change everything, a prayer can change your whole life*